Sunday, November 30, 2008

Phall Photos

Thanksgiving. It is the one day of the year that we allow ourselves to eat beyond the point of no return- with little to no guilt. There is something about pumpkin, sage and tripdaphan that sends us into the land of oblivion. How else could the TV networks get away with showing the Detroit Lions year after year after year. You know what I’m talking about.
Round 1: Begins way before you sit down to eat. It begins with making the biscuits and cornbread for the dressing. But, you can’t JUST make cornbread. Somewhere in the code of Southern Hospitality you are required to cook some fatty dish to accompany the hot buttery staple.
Round 2: Takes place while the meal is being prepared. Taste the dressing to make sure you have enough sage. Sample the turkey to make sure it isn’t too dry. Eat a hotroll as soon as it comes out of the oven – with loads of melted butter. The glaze on the spiraled ham needs to be tried as well as the consistency of the mashed potatoes. What’s the use of cooking if you can’t enjoy the spoils in the middle of your labors.
Round 3: Finally you sit down to eat. Depending on your holiday tradition you will either pass the dishes around the table, or you will do a walk by- buffet style. Regardless, there’s about a 95% you will have early peas rolling off your plate because there is no room left. Your plate should have a nice geometric curve, representing the billowed sail of the Nina, Pinta and the Santa Maria. You know, keep with the season… do your part for the festivities.
Round 4: You are beyond full at this point, but you just can’t say no. (Where is Nancy Reagan when you really need her?) So, you load up for ‘seconds’ which at this point are really ‘fourths’ but who’s counting.
Round 5: You have a dull ache as your stomach has expanded to twice its original size. The place where the stomach meets the esophagus is registering overload. You have promised yourself to wait for dessert. But, then someone cuts the pumpkin pie and lathers the top with cool-whip. “I’ll just have a sliver… of each” We all know what that means. You have lost complete control.
Round 6: Generally requires some form of antacid or bismuth.
Round 7: Naptime.
Round 8: Did someone say Turkey Sandwich?

I really do love the holidays. They are generally the pause button on the roller coaster we call life. They give us reason to stop and consider the great joys of life. The apostle Paul did not have such a holiday but he did have such an attitude. While sitting in a cold prison cell he penned these words of thankfulness:
Phil 1:3 "I thank my God every time I remember you. In all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now, being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus. It is right for me to feel this way about all of you, since I have you in my heart; for whether I am in chains or defending and confirming the gospel, all of you share in God's grace with me. God can testify how I long for all of you with the affection of Christ Jesus. And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, 10so that you may be able to discern what is best and may be pure and blameless until the day of Christ, 11filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ—to the glory and praise of God.


Not that I have this whole thing figured out, but I do think we have a choice to be grateful or disgruntled. I know the economy is a pretty big stink-O! I realize that Oklahoma State got beat by Oklahoma. I understand the pain... but, in the big scale there's a lot to be thankful for, here's a few of mine:












Sunday, November 2, 2008